A new favorite
picture of mine- under the bridge at Night Light
Over the past year our life has completely changed. I have
dropped down to working just a few hours of nursing a week. We are homeschooling
Ben. The dream of Night Light is a reality and is a daily part of our lives. It
is all different. We are learning so much about people and our world…and about
God’s love. Some days I am in disbelief of what all God has done. I was interviewed
this week by a two girls working on a documentary. A couple of the questions
were “Is your life what you thought it would be” and “are you happy?" Those
questions keep coming back to me. My life is certainly not at all what I
imagined it would be. Not. At. All! I am so thankful for that! I am glad to
know that someone much bigger and brighter than myself is leading the way. And
yes, I am so happy. I believe we all have seasons. Two years ago, my season
looked much different than it does today. I was happy but it was rough,
and scary. I am thankful. Without all of
that, I know I wouldn't be here, doing what I am today. Our minister said this
on Sunday, “We rejoice with those who rejoice and we mourn with those who mourn
and we let God be God”. What I have learned is that in each season God wants us
to have relationships to rejoice and mourn with each other. I have no idea what
my future holds but I know that God does.
I share stories of what goes on under the bridge so that
others may see the importance of ALL people having someone to rejoice and mourn
with. I share them so others can see not what I have done but what HE is
doing. When we first started, I have to admit, there were nights that I had an
attitude of how I was going to help the people downtown. That is so untrue. I
see it now. We help each other. I know what it does for me when a friend comes
to me and hugs me- under the bridge or passing by at the mall. We are made to
cheer each other on, lift each other up, and show love. We are made that way! It is vital for everyone to know they are cared for. It is so important.
Joyce
I met Joyce about 3 weeks ago. She appears to be in her late
40’s but age is so different when you’re living on the street or under a
bridge. This was her first time at Night Light. She was dressed in a little
summer dress with her hair pulled back. She was toting several different bags,
I’m sure it was all she owned. From when I first saw her until I officially met
her (which was quite a walking distance) she was picking up trash to help keep
the area clean. I walked over to her with a trash bag and our friendship began.
It was one of those times when you feel
like you've sort of known the person all along and they are just catching you up
on what is most recent in their life. I recognized that in this moment she
needed me to sit and listen. So many times I struggle with this. I think I need
to say something super wise and helpful…thankfully we work with a God that
handles all of that stuff. Her honesty was so simple yet so bold. She shared
her struggles and her coping mechanisms- both the good ones and the bad. She
shared that she knows she is a sinner but doesn't know how to turn from her
struggles. She shared that she felt lost and hopeless. As we visited I thought
about how we all struggle with turning from the sins that we face. I prayed
quietly to myself, that she would be loved on and lifted up through the
relationships that she would encounter under the bridge that night. She hasn't
missed a week since.
Todd
I met Todd 2 weeks ago. He is young, late 20’s or early 30’s.
He was the unexpected for me that night. As we were getting set up he wondered
over and asked what we were doing. I wasn't sure if he was someone that
randomly wondered up, a volunteer, or a guest. After some questioning, I
realized that he was indeed homeless and that this was a completely new environment
for him. We visited briefly and I told him he should get in line for a burger
and hang out with us for the evening. The night got underway and I was busy at
the foot washing station. About 45 minutes into the night he came back over and
questioned what we were doing at this station. I offered to wash his feet or if
he was uncomfortable with that to just take some socks. He couldn't believe we were
washing feet. You could read the confusion and disbelief on his face but you
could also see the hurt all over him. I got him to sit and remove his socks and
shoes. I rolled up his jeans and began to wash his feet. He kept apologizing
that I was having to wash his feet. I told him I really enjoyed being able to
do this for people and changed the conversation. There is something that happens when you are
kneeling before a person washing their feet. I can’t even explain it. After 7
months I am usually aware that it is coming and can brace my heart for it.
Tonight, I was not prepared. I didn't ask how long he had been sleeping on the
streets but I would guess that it had only been a couple days. He began to open
up and share his story and about half way through he dissolved into a pile of
tears. He buried his face into his arms and with his feet still in the basin,
curled his upper body into a ball in his lap. He was unable to speak and he was
sobbing. I was completely taken back. I felt the lump in my throat. I had no
words. I literally hurt for him and with him. It took a few minutes and he was
able to regain composure and I was able to finish up. I spoke the few words
that I could even seem to find. Afterwards I sent Jason to visit with him for a
while. He hasn't been back. I am praying so hard that he found a way off of the
streets and into an environment that he can get the help he needs.
Robbie
Oh, Robbie. We met Robbie around Thanksgiving. He had
just moved back to Tulsa. He has been in and out of prison. His first
encounter with drugs was on his 12th birthday when his mom injected
him. He is Jason and my age. He loves baseball. He is super fun and easy to
talk with. We didn't see him for several months. Then, about a month and a half
ago, he started showing up again. He had gotten an apartment and was doing
well. He recently lost it. The first week he was back out under the bridge he
was sober and so disappointed. As the weeks have passed we have watched him
spiral downhill. However, he still is showing up under the bridge and we still
are there to welcome him. Man, it is so hard to watch sometimes. So hard. I
have to remind myself of the times I fall back on my bad habits and what it
means to me to have people in my life that are there to love me regardless. I
was discussing this with Zach from Bridgetown in Portland this weekend. He said
when they are doing good, we are there. When they are struggling, we are there.
The point is that we are there. I am praying that we are able to see his good
days again.
Dennis and Terri
I love Dennis and Terri! They are from the neighborhood and
have been joining us for dinner for months. She is 4 months pregnant. They are so thankful
for every bit of help that they receive. I am thankful for their sweet
friendship. They know all of my kids and make a point to say hello to them.
What a special relationship. Over Easter they gave another volunteer and myself a
sweet card. It had chocolate praying hands in it. I don’t think they will ever
know how much that sweet card meant to me. I know that they don't have much. It was very touching. I can’t wait for sweet baby Tristen to be born and to get some cuddle time in.
The card from Dennis and Terri
